Sunday, November 12, 2006

Not Really Bravado

I got a few comments and pm's about posting my weight on line. If I am going to be successful I have to be honest. I need to also be accountable. If all of my readers know that I am trying to lose weight and know what I weigh and what I want to weigh, then I am held accountable. I am not strong enough-at this point-to hold myself accountable. If I were well then I wouldn't have gained back 20lbs.

Weight has been an issue for me since pueberty. I know I have mentioned this before--I have PCOS and it is a major contributing factor to my weight problems. My weight has been a focus. My mom, she means well, has been on my to watch my weight, to lose weight, etc since pueberty. I was always a thin kid--until I reached a certain age--well that is when the PCOS developed. I could hid most of the weight issue as I was an athelete. I played soccer year round. I was really active. I had a few injuries in high school that caused me to miss most of the season my jr and sr year. I then blew out my knee-had to have ACL reconstruction and was bed ridden for nearly 6 solid months. I packed on quite a bit of weight during that time. With PCOS, it is hard to lose weight--especially if you don't know you have it. As most women don't. So this has been a constant struggle for me. I am lucky that I don't look like my weight. I have a good perctage of muscle mass. I am strong and have some muscle definition. But, I have a long way to go to reach a point where I will once and for all be happy with my body--or so I hope. I know I know have a long term goal. To reach 150 and stay there--forever.

Starting point 219.6 (I Know I said tomorrow-but I really needed to get this off of my chest)

Thank you for all of your support.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What matters is not your weight but that you feel good and strong! But you know that, right?

I think you're beautiful as is and I know you're a great mamma. So remember that when you're riding your bike (-: