One day at a time...

that was a great show...Now that isn't really what I am talking about, but it made me smile. Not that I need any help with smiling these days. I have been a compulsive smiler for a long time. My students hate it because I even smile when I am mad at them or grading thier poor excuse for formal writing. But ever since we were blessed with a baby boy the smile has grown bigger and slightly goofier as well. I am so excited I can't even been swayed by the tiny smile lines that are growing each day. Who cares.

This weekend, for mother's day, hubby and I put together our welcome bag for our little Noah. He really isn't old enough to understand what it is, but I am so thankful that AAI allows this amount of contact because it really allows us to bond with him from half way around the world. We sent a cute little cardinals outfit--we are big baseball fans here in St. Louis. Noah even already has a St. Louis Cardinal Build-a-Bear teddy. I now have to try to be patient as I wait to know that it arrived to the wonderful traveler who is going to take it to him for us. Then I have to wait to get a picture of him with his stuff. We sent a small photo album that is really more of a toy than anything. I know that he really isn't old enough to see the pictures and make out anything other than fuzzy colors but again it is really for the parents more than the infants.

I was naive going into this whole post-referral wait. Now, don't get me wrong I want to hold my baby in my arms, but I can deal with not being able to yet. As we aren't really ready at home for him to arrive yet. The thing that is really hard is not having consistent updates. I know that in a couple of weeks I should get an update as to how he is doing and maybe a new picture, but that just seems so long. I want to see how he is growing. There are families traveling soon and I am hoping that that they will take pictures of our little one-and hold him and love him. I feel good knowing that he is at Wanna and is receiving really great care, but it isn't me who is caring for him. How I want him to come home. I am an obssessive planner and researcher--I am not quite the executor of the plans but I certainly can make plans. I have been number crunching to get an idea of when we may get assigned a group, get a court date, and a travel date. I am making myself crazy.

Hmmm...Maybe that is why I can't stop smiling...