Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Like the last kid picked for the team....

That is exactly how I feel at this moment. Like Team Motherhood is selecting players and I am the nearly the last kid on the playground to be picked. I watch as others get chosen and I wait and wait. The feelings of inferiority creep up and my self-confidence plumments. Now I know that this really isn't how it works, and Merrily and Merelene are not looking through the line up of draft picks and putting me aside based on my lack of parental experience. But emotionally I can sympathize with every kid that was ever picked last for the team. I promise that I will teach my children to pick the kid who usually is picked last first once in a while and let those usually picked first wait it out. WAIT--what if it is my kid who is picked last. Oh this parenting thing is going to be hard. Who ever thought I was this emotional and sensitive.

I should take some consolation that referrals are happening and things are moving forward. Another family received a referral of a baby boy. Their dossier was sent out 1/25--the day before mine. I am so happy for all of the families that have received thier referrals and I do not begrudge them a moment of happiness. I am surrounded by players already selected for Team Motherhood. Both of my neighbors are pregnant, my teenage students are consistenly being chosen for the team and here I am waiting to be picked...I am begging team captain--PICK ME PICK ME...I won't let you down.

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